I know.. i’m so completely overdue for a blog.. a real one. but i have to get this out of my system.
I can’t get away from this.
You’re on the bumper sticker on the car in front of me.
I go to buy a new fragrance… one that smells completely different from anything I own, and when I get home to check reviews, i find out its strikingly similar to one that you’d love.
You’re the car that cuts me off when I’m in a rush.
You’re the song that i fall in love with… or at the very least, hear everywhere I go. When did cafe’s start playing THAT?
The neighborhood is on a billboard I have to pass when I drive home.
Everyone wants to talk about your education.
I try to exhaust my brain on the subject, hoping to get it out like air seeping out of a once full balloon…
and yet, you show up in my dreams over and over again.
what is it about you that makes you hard to forget? maybe its that i don’t truly want to forget you. i don’t want to forget the emotion attached to you. its strange… today feels like red, and tomorrow it will be yellow… there’s really no stability in emotion. its something we lack complete control over, and that in itself drives me crazy most of the time… until i realize that this is where the beauty in it lies. In my inability to control every moment of it… fine then. laissez faire it is, and laissez faire it shall be. I’m hands off. I will let the situation develop as it will. A good friend told me to trust the process. I’ll take that advice.
It was sweet seeing your face in my dream last night. If by some odd struck of luck…. or fate, you dreamed that too…. my answer would have been, "I wish I did… and if I could go back and do it all over… i would have stayed." hmmm… your spirit felt beautiful…just as it did then. sweet dreams, indeed.
an aside: don’t assume anything.
I’ll bet you think this song is about you, don’t you? (c) Carly Simon’s You’re so vain
